Vinnie & Twy

Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

No Experience Necessary

In Uncategorized on June 1, 2012 at 10:32 am

So today, I went to The Companies Office to register the business name.  I know, right?

The Companies Office is a branch of the Manitoba Provincial Government, in fact, the offices for the Legislative Assembly are on the same floor in the Woodsworth Building. 

I arrived fairly early and I was the first one there.  The sign said to take a number so I did.  It was 67.  Then I stood there waiting for the staff to notice me or acknowledge my presence in some way.  The 5 ladies at the counter were busy chatting, so I waited.   Soon, the blonde one asked me if I was there to register a business name.


She then asked me a couple more questions and said she would assist me. 


Then, a young girl, wearing jeans and a hoodie  walked over, totally ignored (the only client in the whole office) me, proceeded to interrupt and give shit to the nice lady who had been helping me.  This went on at length, causing my nice lady to turn her chair completely around to pay attention to this unqualified, uneducated, casually dressed supervisor of some sort. 

Since I had some unexpected free time, I counted how many people were sitting at desks and gathered around not getting any work done.  17 plus me.

I used the remainder of my time to stare this young lady down and fantasize about which of my former employers would fire her unceremoniously for this unprofessional behaviour.  Obviously, she had never worked anywhere else in her life.  She had certainly never worked in hospitality or retail.  I even had enough time to imagine how each one of my sisters would deal with her.  

When she finally went away, my nice helper lady had to excuse herself to write down all the instructions she had been given. Afterwards, I told the nice lady that I was shocked. I wasn’t really. This kind of stuff happens all the time here in Winnipeg. I also said I would have fired that girl instantly if I could have.

That was when realized that the supervisor girl must be a relative of someone important. Maybe even Greg Selinger’s daughter or something.

Rather than waste more of my time filing a formal complaint on this beautiful day, I think I’ll call Caroline over at Birks and tell her what a great job she does.


Asbestos in Gillam

In bitching, Uncategorized on March 4, 2012 at 2:27 pm


These photos were shared on facebook today by a resident of Gillam Manitoba.

This is the local dump in Gillam Manitoba. According to the tags, these are bags of asbestos fibres.  

I got this from the Town of Gillam website,

March 3, 2012
The Town of Gillam Council made an informed decision to accept non-hazardous waste into the Gillam waste disposal ground. Approval and guidelines were received from Manitoba Conservation for the handling and disposal of the material and the work will carry on over the next few days. Due to the increased traffic at the waste disposal ground, we are asking the public to use caution when utilizing the site. MAYOR AND COUNCIL

Non-hazardous material.  Nice try.  We already know that asbestos is a dangerous poison and it was removed from all the houses when I was a small child in the 1970s.  I have vivid memories of workmen coming to drill holes in the sides of many houses and removing it as I played nearby. You can still see evidence of those holes on some houses. 

From the photos, you can see some of the bags are all ready coming apart.  Those that aren’t, will come apart eventually.  

If you have ever been to a dump, then you’ll know that dumps are a favorite hangout of birds, bears and other creatures.  Does it cause cancer and lung disease in animals do you think?  Or does it only do that to humans?

I would have been shocked, save for the recent stories about the asbestos industry in Canada over the past year or so.  

Prime Minister Harper has been the new champion of the Canadian Asbestos industry for sometime.  So I guess situations like this were only a matter of time.


It’s Not Rocket Science Just Mark Your X

In Canadian Federal Election 2011, Canadian politics, Uncategorized on April 14, 2011 at 10:29 am

Kids, kids, kids….

When they told you at school that voting was a privilege, a right and your duty. You know, the way to have your say in how this country is run. They were actually not joking. It wasn’t an exaggeration or some fancy newspeak way of tricking you.

It’s great that lots of you have paid enough attention to be worried about the state of Canada. It’s even more great that you guys have bothered to speak out all over this vast internet via facebook and youtube. A+. Excellent. Good job making viral videos and this nifty website called Super pleased.

However; we have a serious problem. There is another movement going on that has gathered way too much steam. Boycott The Federal Election is a completely dumb idea (Dave, I mean you too even though you are totally NOT a kid anymore). Not voting because someone you have never met doesn’t think the way you do, is not going to be a very effective way of making them think your same kind of thoughts.

I will tell you a sneaky way to exchange ideas with other people that actually works. Try talking to them. Hell, it even works on people who are old and people who are rich. I’ve tried it many times and man is it ever cool. You can even use it on politicians.

Here are some general instructions:

Step 1. Using your GOOGLE machine, attempt to find the local contact info for a Canadian political party in your vicinity.

Step 2. If you happen to have a CELL PHONE or an ORDINARY PHONE, dial the number provided by GOOGLE. If someone answers the telephone, tell that person that you are interested in getting involved in politics and you would like to find out more about their party and what they stand for. Chances are that person will say GREAT!!! and proceed to start a conversation with you. If that conversation goes well, you might go to their geographical location to meet those people and see if you like them.

**helpful hint…if you go and meet those people and discover that you can’t stand them because they seem crazy; (and this can happen. Hey, it’s a risk you take whenever you put yourself out there) By all means, run away. Do not FREAK OUT. Simply repeat step 2.**

You should now be able to cast your ballot with confidence. Steps 3 – 5 are only for those who have extra time on their hands and/or feel that we could all benefit from their revolutionary ideas.

Step 3. Once you have discovered a group of people who seem somewhat reasonable to you, start hanging out with them. This will allow you the opportunity to spread your smart ideas and impress others with your wit and charm.

Step 4. Help out, get to know the candidates and then you will know who to vote for.

Step 5. If you still can’t bring yourself to vote for anyone, become a candidate yourself or if you get really desperate; start your own political party. That’s what Tommy Douglas did. How do you think we got The Green Party and The Pirate Party? No, it’s not easy, but it’s totally allowed.

As far as joining an existing party, shit, that’s super easy! They actually want you to! They will be all smiley and everything when you show up! They especially love it when smart young people show up at their office!

Put your money where your mouth is kids. Don’t leave politics to the losers and the wingnuts. If you care about how you live and how your neighbours live, go out and vote.

Never forget this; the wingnuts always vote and they always vote for other wingnuts.

No Virginia; There Is No Santa Claus – part 1

In bitching, Bullshit Winnipeg, Canadian politics, Stupid Losers, Uncategorized on November 19, 2010 at 9:12 pm

As most of you already know, I was recently involved in running my sister Jenny’s campaign for public office. More specifically, for City Councillor of Mynarski Ward here in Winnipeg. For the most part it was a lot of fun. We were generously supported by so many people. We met local voters with interesting stories and we tried to be helpful whenever we could. We built a small but powerful team of volunteers and we can never do enough to thank them.

However, one or two things that happened may have changed my view of the Canadian political arena for good. For starters, I had been warned by Conservatives about something called “THE NDP MACHINE”. Oooh. Scary! They told us scandalous stories of their cheatey tactics and unscrupulous behaviour, but I took no heed. Everyone knows Conservatives are all liars anyway. I would never listen to what they had to say. So there.

My opinion of the NDP (up until now) had been based in part, on the epic story of Mr. Tommy Douglas and the good T.V news reputation of one Ed Broadbent. Besides, I have met some NDPers personally, and they were very nice to me. Polite and everything. Who in their right mind could accuse the sweet boyscout like NDP of anything other than being the good guys? Yeah sure, they are sometimes badly dressed and rarely seem to get decent haircuts, but some kind of evil “MACHINE”? Well, I guess there was that Svend Robinson incident. You know, the shoplifting. But, come on! That’s hardly a “MACHINE”. It’s only one guy!

This “NDP MACHINE” they speak of, perhaps it is not the actual “people”, but a mind control device operated by some nefarious super-villian who has infiltrated their ranks? Maybe. Seems likely. The Anti-Douglas?

Throughout the campaign we heard from voters who had felt they had been affected by the “NDP MACHINE” and voters who were being pressured by their unions to vote for the NDP. We met countless new immigrants who told us (some with tears in their eyes) that they had been forced to allow an NDP sign in their yard or there would be “trouble” from the government. (What? What kind of trouble?) Surely, this is pure speculation.

I know, that as a former union member myself, I received a few calls from unions and the Labour Council instructing me who to vote for, but who listens to what their union has to say in these modern times? Anyone?

One lady, who happens to be disabled, called us crying after a brick came flying through her living room window. Well, that is pretty mean. That could definitely be the work of a super-villian with a “MACHINE”. Sure. Like a potato gun, but for bricks.

When we got to her house, she was a puddley mess and she told us that the man who she saw throw the brick, had condemned her for having a “Jenny” sign in her front yard and yelled to her that he was a “personal friend” of Ross Eadie’s. Huh? Legbreaker tactics? No…that’s still only one guy. (well, we’re up to 2 at this point, possibly a few more, but still, doesn’t amount to a hill o’beans) Anyway, she wound up calling all the different candidates to ask for signs so that she couldn’t be accused of favouring any one over any other. Solved.

Let’s pretend that all of those people overreacted. Yes, let’s.

Also, unbelievable but true, was the situation we ran into with Canada Post. Since we had a limited number of bodies on our election team, we made the fateful decision to have our brochures delivered by Canada Post. Even though it was very expensive, we decided that it would be money well spent. We felt that this was the most efficient way to ensure that every household in the ward had an introduction to our candidate. Again, we were warned by certain members of the Conservative Party, that Canada Post was not to be trusted with political mail. They are part of the “MACHINE”!
Woooooo! The “NDP MACHINE”!

“Hogwash!” we said.

We mailed our leaflets and carried on with the business of electioneering, knocking on door after door in neighbourhood after neighbourhood.

We soon found that very few households had received our mailer. It seemed like entire areas had not had it delivered. Too many to ignore.

Odd. Geez. We mailed it…

On one such street, Redwood Avenue, we happened upon a mailman who we stopped. We showed him the bright pink mailer and asked him if he had seen it or remembered delivering it. He told us that he had seen it at the depot, but it had never made it to his mailbox and he had not delivered it. When we pressed him for more details, he told us that it was most likely delivered, but by another mailman “on a day when he was away sick”. Hmmm. Could it be that he was….(heee)….lying?

A while later, in another neighbourhood, Jenny asked another mailman if he had been the one to deliver the mail during the week that our mailer was scheduled to be delivered. He said that he had and in fact, had delivered the mail every single day that week. So, she showed him the pink brochure. The mailman abruptly changed his mind about having worked that week and decided that he had “been on holidays”.

Then a former Canada Post employee informed us that for the 25 years that she had been a sorter, it was always common practice to delay delivery of all non-NDP political mail. No! That can’t be true! Oh how naive we had been! Such blind faith!

She went on to describe to us how it was done. (I’ll save those details in case I am called to testify in court) She also told us that often, they would “accidentally” deliver political flyers to the wrong ridings. Or deliver them long after the election. Then she gently mocked us for thinking that our brochure would be delivered by Canada Post when we were running such an obviously non-NDP affiliated campaign. After all, Canada Post employees are all part of a very NDP friendly and powerful union.

“But it’s the Queen’s mail!

At that point we began to think that the evil Stephen Harper may have had good reason (for once) when he threatened to dismantle and privatize Canada Post. They do appear to be controlled by the “NDP MACHINE”. Perhaps Svend Robinson really is behind this so-called “MACHINE”, well, then you know, there’s no telling how far he’d go or what he’s really capable of. After all, he is a known shoplifter.

So, we thought about it for a bit, had a heated debate amongst the team and then we called the PMO to tell on them.

Surprisingly, we did get some action from that phone call. That action trickled right on down to the Canada Post outlet in Winnipeg on Mountain Avenue pretty quickly. Wow. Not bad.

When the post office did call us back, all they offered was a discount of $100.00 on our next mail out. Pfft. Lame.

Screw them, we sent Daddy. As expected, Daddy explained things to them very carefully and very loudly. He talked about the legalities and how much he wanted to call the RCMP and the probable loss of their jobs and possible jail time and everything else they could look forward to. Our next mailer was delivered to every single house in the whole ward and all on the same day. Nice.

Moral of the story, never send a Conservative Prime Minister to do the job of an angry father.

To be continued…

I Promise Not to Blog; I Promise Not to Blog; I Promise…

In Canadian politics, My Personal Problems, Uncategorized on October 26, 2010 at 9:32 am

This is so not fair!!!

This election campaign has been the most craziest and ridiculous in the history of the North End and I am smack dab in the middle of it fighting the good fight, and here I am not allowed to blog.

Dammit. This sucks!

I had so much cool inside info and have witnessed so many shocking things too! I could’ve been the one to scoop very important news and become a famous blogger and everything.

Here I am so jealous of Reed Solomon who is allowed to blog whenever he wants! Even though he chose to blog about Jenny in a somewhat meanish (but quite funny) way.


In Uncategorized on September 26, 2010 at 11:09 pm

The Bitchabout blog is currently on hiatus until after the civic election. My sister, Jenny Motkaluk (as some of you already know) is running for City Council in Winnipeg. For those of you who care, I will return shortly after October 27th, 2010.

I am dying to tell you all about the campaign and the drama, however, I promised that I wouldn’t. Sucky, I know.

In the meantime, vote for Jenny.

Out Of The Frying Pan

In bitching, Canadian politics, Uncategorized on February 12, 2010 at 12:25 am

baby come back...

Last week, I wrote the Harpergate blog and the thing is, every word in it is 100% true and accurate. I did not have to exaggerate one tiny bit, even though the list seems ludicrous. (All the red words are links to the sources). Worse is that there are many, many more examples of Harper’s bad behaviour. Like, I didn’t even get into the whole Copenhagen fiasco, and Chavez hadn’t given him what for yet. In fact, there are so many that I would’ve had to make it into more of a book if I were to get it all in.

So many more crazy incidents have been recorded since that fateful Harpergate blog, and it’s only been a week! Christ Almighty! How much more can we take??

Yesterday, I saw with my very own eyes, a video of a protest in Downtown Vancouver on the CBC. The video showed the usual signs and goretex jackets that Vancouverites are so famous for. Couple of bullhorns and about a dozen bored looking cops standing around. All in all, nothing too thrilling.

Yet somehow, Dimitri Soudas, the Conservative “spin doctor”, if he can even be called that considering most of what he writes is pure fiction, translated that scene into “Day Of Terror”.

Wow, that’s some imagination! He should go to Hollywood, I’m sure he can get work writing for the movies.

By the way, Daddy was in downtown Vancouver yesterday, so I asked him about the “Day of Terror” and he laughed his head off for about ten minutes. There you have it. “Day Of Terror”.

Is Harper that big of a sissy? A dozen city police and however many RCs he has in tow, and he couldn’t get out of the car? What a suck. My kid walked to school alone everyday, without police protection, knowing full well, that the neighborhood bully would be lying in wait to kick the shit out of him enroute. He was only ten, and he never once whined. He toughed it out til his mom found out and put a stop to it. Is that what Stevie boy is hoping for? His Mommy? We’ve never had a Prime Minister of Canada that was too chickenshit to go out and answer to his people. Will wonders never cease…

Today, I waited patiently for Harper to address the BC legislature because
A) rallies had been planned to greet him
and B) There had been some rumours about Harper possibly being questioned about federal matters.

I watched the sugary sweet monologue performed in its entirety. BLeeeCH

It wasn’t easy to take notes between gagging and giggling, but I did. Lucky thing too! Yikes!

Let’s combine one or two of the more memorable quotes from todays words of “wisdom” with another Harper quote from today’s news, shall we?

The speech to the BC legislature was peppered with “That Canada; Our Canada”. Included were some Dubya-like phrases that I thought he must’ve thrown in for quotability. “Necessary security” was one really weird thing he said.

“Creating the yesterdays we shall cherish tommorow”; barf “trying to touch a star for a brief shining moment” and barf.

Then he rattled off a list of unlikely patriots which included a variety of Canadians like security guards and police. I wrote this little gem down; “Our Armed Forces spread our gifts of democracy and freedom” abroad and in Afghanistan. Alotta talk about enforcement. Gotta say, I found it a bit odd considering he was supposedly talking about the Olympics and gold medals and whatnot.

I found it odd that is, until I read this story about France and the U.S. who are angry at Iran:
“Harper said Canada will support its allies on the issue.” Remember, Harper has referred to Iran as “evil” in the not so distant past.

What does that mean? Is he trying to act tough? I sure hope not. When weaklings start acting tough they always freak out and take it too far.

Can we please get this guy out of our office before it’s too late? Cuz it sure sounds like he’s up to something really stupid.

Little Miss Helpful; Yes That’s Me

In Canadian politics, Uncategorized on February 4, 2010 at 7:20 pm

The Conservative Reform Alliance Party, as many Canadians already knew (and a lot more are finding out), is jammed with inexperienced and/or younger members. Many (not all mind you, but close) Conservative MPs arrived in Ottawa in the back of a turnip truck, so they cannot be expected to answer questions because they are too scared to stray from the script. These guys have not got a hot clue between them as to what they should be doing right now. Every time they go to the press with these bullshit pre-approved statements, they come off looking like absolute morons. It doesn’t work for telephone solicitors and it isn’t working for them.

It’s sad. I know. (Can I get an Awww…?)

Kind hearted Canadian that I am, I am willing to do them all a big fat favor. Whether or not anyone else is willing to take pity on them, I feel compelled to educate them on what will work for them and what will not.

When the leader of your party, be he Prime Minister or be he some other douche, takes a nose dive like Mr. Harper has done in recent months, you really need to think twice about your allegiance to him if you want to hold on to your own political career. Nobody wants to be a rat, but the Conservative MPs should start making plans to abandon the sinking ship. This is not rocket science.

Right now, today, the Conservatives should go to their own homes and find a quiet place to think. They absolutely must try to see the big picture here. Harper is desperate. It’s become so horribly obvious. All of the ridiculous statements he has been coming up with are only making things worse.

When they get home, here are the questions they need to ask themselves;

1. Can it even be possible that I agree with any of these garbagey one liners?
2. Do I seriously think that I am fooling anyone?
3. Am I really still afraid of Harper?
4. Do I think he can recover from this huge ugly mess?
5. What would happen if I publicly disagreed with him?
6. Why am I so afraid of Harper?
7. Do I ever want to hold public office again?
8. If I continue on this path, will I be left with any self-respect whatsoever?
9. Is it a good idea to be out looking for a job in this economy?

In stressful times like these, it’s not always easy to think clearly, so for the greater good, I will provide the answers to these tough questions. Besides, some just don’t do well under pressure at the best of times. For example, a lot of people have a hard time with formal testing, but that doesn’t always mean they are not smart. Regardless, they should still be able to follow these easy to read instructions.

1. The answer is no. It is completely impossible for anyone with more than a grade 4 education to buy into this load of shit that Harper is trying to sell.
2. Again, no. While you may hope that you are fooling people, deep down you know the truth.
3. Yes. You really are terrified of this man.
4. At this point, any thought of Harper’s recovery is pure fantasy.
5. If you did come out publicly against Harper, or even simply answered a question for real, you would gain some small amount of instant respect.
6. You are afraid because you think he is your boss. Don’t worry about that so much. You were elected to represent your constituents. You might think about starting to do that a bit.
7. Well, do you? If you do want to, will you deserve to after Harper is thrown out of office?
8. Nope.
9. It is a pretty bad time to be looking for work. EI and/or welfare will not leave you with much pocket money.

The wave of popularity that grew out of the National Arts Gala performance is over. That time will not come again. Give.It.Up.

Sometimes, when a leader loses the trust of the people and of the party, the party will find a new leader. You guys could maybe try that. It has worked in the past. Like I’m just saying, it’s definitely something to think about. Can’t hurt. What have you got to lose anyway?

If this saves some of your careers, then hey, you’re very welcome. Anytime.

Harpergate? You’ve Got To Be Kidding Me

In bitching, Canadian politics, Uncategorized on February 1, 2010 at 10:23 pm

Is there some kind of checklist that Harper is working from? Like I mean a list of dirty deeds used by political nutjobs of history? Are you picking up what I’m laying down? Are you?

What I’m seeing in my minds eye is a list something like this:

_ gag the mediacheck
(Hitler did that, as did Peron, Mussolini, Lenin, Stalin and a few others)
_ break the government coffers and get rid of social programscheck
(Stalin, can’t say who else, am I right?)
_ prorogue parliament got that done
(King Charles, Oliver Cromwell)
_ stifle the intelligentsiaalways
(again, Hitler, Stalin etc etc)
_ plant newspaper stories to discredit enemiesyou bet
(Pinochet, Doc Duvalier and every other despot since forever including many Ancient Emperors)
_ use your control of the media to freak out the citizens uh huh
(Marcos, Baby Doc, his dad and a lot of their friends)
_ de-legalize abortionworkin on it
_ establish racial dominanceseriously trying?
(I can’t even get into it)
_ use propaganda to make yourself seem like a herocheck
(Attila The Hun, The Crusaders,the entire Eastern Block during the cold war)
_ ignore all protestsdone
(Chairman Mao, am I right?)
_ entertain the masses with your musical “genius” while you lay waste to the kingdomcheck, check and check
(Emperor Nero)
_ vilify whistleblowers yep
(this has always been popular amongst dictators of every ilk)
_ get rid of those pesky “rights” and “freedoms” that always get in the way check
(Ceauşescu et all)
_ hire some goons to break into an office to steal information before it gets outcheck and check
(Um hello; that was Nixon. There was a book AND a movie)

What’s next? Same thing we do every night; try to take over the world !

It’s probably good to remember that a lot of the guys who made regular use of these tricks of the trade, with the exception of Brain; were either exiled or executed (sometimes both) at some point, but they were all able to carry on for a good long time first.


“King” Stephen and The Alberta Runaround

In Canadian politics, Uncategorized on January 26, 2010 at 7:09 pm

Once upon a time, there was an ordinary boy. His name was Stephen. He did not like to be ordinary. He thought that it would be much more fun to be a king. As he grew older, Stephen began to realize, as many children do, that his dream of becoming king may not ever come true.

You see, the country that he lived in already had a Queen. Even though the Queen was very old and might die at any time, Stephen was not a prince and therefore, he was not in line for the throne. Not being in line for the throne meant that he could never be king.

“That’s not fair!”, he cried.

Even though he was very upset, Stephen knew that it was the way his world worked.

Just like all children in his country, Stephen went to school and read many books about the world. All of the books told him the same thing; he could never be king. But Stephen didn’t care, he wanted to be king anyway.

When he got a little older, Stephen studied at The Calgary School. The Calgary School, developed something called “The Alberta Runaround”. Now, The Alberta Runaround is a very specialized and effective style of manipulation. When used properly, it can be almost guaranteed that you will get what you want and look good at the same time. It is based on bullying and uses 3 main principles; triangulation, scapegoating and stalling.

Triangulation is a mind game that works just like a triangle. Simply explained, you befriend 2 people and pit them against each other. This drives a wedge between them and in the end, you are seen as the hero by both just before you screw them over. They never see it coming. You can find very good examples of this used in TV reality shows, such as Survivor and Rock of Love.

Scapegoating is a good thing to try if you want to influence a whole group. In case of trouble, there must always be some poor sucker to blame. Preferably someone kinda powerless who can’t easily resist.

Causing a lengthy delay for no good reason, is often referred to as stalling. Stalling is a terrific way of jamming up your enemies or your friends, depending on the situation.

Should you get desperate, then you can rely on a little something called JFDI. That stands for Just F*#*ing Do It. This almost always works, because we all know that it’s easier to seek forgiveness than to ask for permission.

Oh, how Stephen loved The Calgary School because a lot of other children there wanted to be kings too. They were just like him! How nice!

There was a magical being at The Calgary School, sort of like a fairy godmother, but not, called Tom Flanagan.

Mr. Flanagan taught Stephen that besides having a Queen, the government in their country also had a Prime Minister. Prime Minister certainly seemed like a wonderful thing to be and a lot like being a king. Best of all, anyone could become Prime Minister, even if they were just ordinary.

Stephen said “Please Mr. Flanagan, tell me how to become Prime Minister.”

Mr. Flanagan liked Stephen, so he told him to join a political party and try using The Alberta Runaround. Stephen did as he was told and got on to the business of convincing a lot of people to vote for him in the election. Many, many others agreed with Stephen’s ideas so he became the leader of his political party. Once he became the leader, Stephen still had to win another election and then, only then, could he become Prime Minister.

Stephen knew that this would be a very difficult task indeed, because his political party was only popular in one part of the country.

Again, Stephen asked Tom Flanagan what he should do. Mr. Flanagan told Stephen that The Alberta Runaround works everywhere, not just in Alberta. This made Stephen very happy indeed, because he had been practicing, and he was getting quite good at it.

Stephen was able to use The Alberta Runaround to take over another, much more respected political party and steal their name. Once he had done that, he became Prime Minister quite handily.

Now, being the Prime Minister was lots of fun, but Stephen had not forgotten that he really wanted to be king.

So, he told Mr. Flanagan that he still wanted to be king. Well, as you can imagine that would be a near impossible achievement in a country that already had a Queen.

Mr. Flanagan thought about this question for some time. Finally, he knew that the only way for Stephen to become king was to change the philosophy of the citizens using The Alberta Runaround on the whole country for a very long time.

With that, Stephen prorogued parliament and used JFDI to take power.

That’s how Stephen Harper used The Alberta Runaround to become King of Canada and nobody was allowed to live happily ever after.